finally another piano lesson. been feeling slightly on the edge of sanity lately. found myself talking to myself a while ago... I've been absent from my bodily shell, if you were talking to me, that wasn't really me, at least I don't think it is... its just a coward. fucking coward.

don't even want to practice my bass much anymore, feel like just sitting infront of the computer pressing refresh. seeing if anyone even cares. everyone is just scattering around like ants, living their machine lives. fuck them. its okay, you're all busy trying to secure yourselves.

its like twisting a piece of cloth. the torsion is taxing on my sanity. theres no internet and even if there is, theres nobody there. and even if there is, they are saying the exact same thing as me right now. where is everyone, why is everyone hiding. where is the real everyone.

be real fucking happy, when u die, u can tell yourselves you won this game, by studying hard, getting a job, getting a wife, spreading the STD of human life, and feeling good in this melancholic nightmare.

after all, this is real life, its not a game. when u die, its real life... whats the fucking difference really. whats stopping you from taking a gun and shooting up a few other human beings, then will you realise that real life is actually gaming at its best. that the whole world is just your sandbox mode.

WDYDWYD ?

because somebody has to. and nobody wants to.

currently listening : Hey you - Pink Floyd